Welcome to #31daysofselfcare2018

 

The basis of today’s post comes from a previous post “I See Me in the Mirror.” Bringing balance, harmony, and equality into our lives depends strongly on our ability to build loving relationships. And THIS requires us to understand we are worthy, loved, and powerful. With this understanding, we can then take the steps necessary to grow a healthy life not only for ourselves but by extension, the world.

Harmony is not an easy achievement. As mentioned in previous posts, it’s okay to feel negative emotions, but it’s essential to channel them into a productive outcome. Remember that harmony can mean that some people and situations aren’t allowed in our life, but we can send light and love to follow them on their journey.

We must instill harmony in our relationships, including our spiritual connection. Greet relationships with compassion, as well as the relationship with yourself. Look at the other person’s viewpoint. A sense of humor helps. Let go of control. Forgive with an open heart and leave resolutions to Spirit.

Here’s a personal example.

I inherited a family member who for years was emotionally and mentally abusive toward me. Then one day, something happened that triggered a series of events that after quite a bit of work on the situation, left me strengthened to address this person in a loving and caring manner. My husband and I sat with them and told them how they treated me left me feeling hurt and sad.

My approach met with a blank stare and verbal denial. No apologies. No effort to understand how I felt. I resolved at that moment; it was okay for me not to have that pain in my life. As the years went on, I gave the effort to resolve this situation a few more times. Eventually, it became necessary to stand my ground and not allow this person to come in contact with me because every time they were, they would offer something hurtful.

The situation has caused great strife in my life and within my family. Still, I sat with it and tried to understand the other person’s viewpoint. Through meditative prayer, some answers came to me. Until there is a change, this person is not allowed to have a meaningful place in my life, but I continue to reach through prayer for love and healing, allowing space for the solution to not be one of my makings.

It is a process that is really, really hard, but I want harmony in my heart. Disharmony causes an unbalance regarding other family relationships. You see, our harmony and balance effects all connections.

To create harmony, balance, and equity, in relationships, I am clear in my thoughts, with compassion offered to all parties, including myself. Like all of us, I am a work in progress.

I remind myself that we all matter. 

Where does this leave the issue of equality in relationships? When one person has power over another, that is inequality. When each side considers they are unheard, it feels disempowering. In finding the strength within myself through the understanding that I am loved, worthy, and powerful, I was able to approach this other person with love and an element of understanding. Although, truthfully, at the start, I just wanted to be heard. I wanted to feel equal with this person. Over time, I gained equality regardless of how the other felt because I didn’t let go of love for myself. Again, it has been tough. Don’t give up! These circumstances can play into how we address all of our relationships. Often the healing of one situation allows us healing of other situations. The work involved is worth the effort to feel the freedom of not defining ourselves by how people treat us.

 

We must look into our hearts and find what works to create harmony, balance, and equity. Leave the rest.

  • Forgiveness
  • Purity in the resolution
  • A compassionate approach
  • Humor 
  • Allow space for spiritual growth