Welcome to #31daysofselfcare2018

Woohoo! The second day of #31daysofselfcare2018 continues to lay a foundation for successful self-care. Download a January calendar and pages for notes to help remember your thoughts on this self-care journey. I’m honored to have you join me.

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step”. I think Lao Tzu wasn’t only saying great things start from humble beginnings. He was saying, staying in one place is good for resting, but reminding us not to stay in one place long if we want to move forward and through life. “A thousand journeys over a lifetime begins with one step”.

Each journey is formed from the many opportunities presented. They are waiting for us to reveal and release them. No one choice is necessarily the right choice forever, but it’s the right choice for the moment of it’s revealing.  Marcus Valerius Martial, of the 4th Century and known for his epigrams, said something quite remarkable and un-epigram like. He said, “Life is not merely to be alive, but to live well.”  We can have many journeys in one lifetime when life is not only lived but lived well.

How do we live well, and reveal and release opportunities?

Another lesson in self-care is taking charge of opportunities. What is it that WE want to do with our lives? How do we consider the fit when we consider our responsibilities and relationships. It’s best to learn early on that our heart deserves to be comfortable and at ease. There are times in our life when other people’s needs take front row seat, but we MUST not forget and lose ourselves even in that moment.

In the first #31daysofcaring2018 post, I shared I left my job in search of something better. It may have seemed like a snap judgment, but in reality, I had been turning over in my mind what my opportunities might be available. I’ve tried out many opportunities since that day, and while at times they seemed wrong, I can look back and see each one prepared me for moving forward.

This is the process I used. It can be applied to any life changes.

  • Acknowledge what is happening in your life.
    • When we acknowledge our actions and surroundings, it gives us a sense of control. Overall, complete control, no matter how much we want it, is an illusion. The sooner we learn that lesson, the better!
    • When I decided to leave my job and step out on a different journey, I didn’t like most of what was happening that was work-related and it was negatively affecting everything else about my life. You know the saying “when momma ain’t happy, nobody’s happy”. Until the moment I decided to leave my job, I had been held hostage by my own limiting beliefs about myself and the world around me which were daily reinforced by my work conditions.
  • Do you like what you see?
    • Nope! I disliked nearly everything I was seeing with my eyes and my mind was telling me. You see, the mind wants to do what it’s always done. It will let us explore new ideas, but it always wants to fall back on what it already knew. But I was feeling like something was being revealed to me by seeing with my heart. My heart was telling me that there was more “out there”. I started looking for clues and analyzing the skills and talents I had. Did I want to build on those, or build something else? Ultimately, I chose to build something else.
  • How does what you see with your eyes make you feel?
    • Ha! I saw mayhem everywhere. I saw employees who were unhappy. I saw opportunities lacking that would accommodate what I was beginning to feel I wanted in my life. I saw if I wanted to have a happier life, it would mean not staying on this particular journey. I was miserable, dejected, and depressed.
  • How does what you see with your heart make you feel?
    • Seeing with my heart was an improvement! My heart told me that I was destined to help people. My heart started to see not just mayhem and unhappiness. I saw people who engaged with each other. I felt their hearts wanting to open. I felt a certain commonality when I would walk through the halls and greet people with a smile and happy greeting. We all want to be happy. We all want that opportunity. Expanding the opportunity of caring and sharing helps us all reveal and release.
    • I began feeling better when I envisioned myself in a position that would fill me with passion. I was feeling like something was being revealed to me by seeing with my heart. My heart was telling me that there was more “out there”. I started looking for clues and analyzing the skills and talents I had. Did I want to build on those, or build something else? Ultimately, I chose to build something else. Here’s an important lesson to share. The heart does NOT take the easy way out. The heart really is looking out for your best interest and will challenge you in ways you never knew you could be challenged.
  • What opportunities are best for me to use right now?
    • That’s right. Before I even left my job I had been thinking of what opportunities I might reveal and release. Did I want to go back to teaching? Should I start my own non-profit? Quite honestly, my initial response to each idea was to analyze as to which opportunity was the easiest. That was when I was only exploring opportunities from my old mindset. Also, I was wounded and tired and lacked confidence. I chose to go back to school and take a smattering of classes that challenged me in every way. I was determined to figure out how my next journey was to look. Ha! If I had only known that more mayhem was ahead, I probably would have considered. Fortunately, we don’t always get everything revealed at once!

Remember:

  • No choice is wrong.
  • There is an infinite number of opportunities. If one doesn’t work out, another will.
  • Keep trying them out until one sparks the light within. You may even be surprised when one choice that is less desirable leads to another that is everything you intended.
  • In the end, it’s about what makes YOU happy and healthy. Not what someone tells you should make you happy and healthy.
  • Be open. Opportunities are not revealed to a closed mind. Changing our view of a situation reveals the disguised and invisible.

Teaser for tomorrow – I’m going to be telling you to get out! That’s right! Get out!